Oct 2, 2005
What's so enticing about a Blueberry flavored cereal with marshmallows hawked by a cartoon ghost? My wife and I were in the super market the other day and I came across the holy trinity of breakfast cereals, Count Chocula, Frankenberry and Boo-Berry, the father, the son and the blueberry ghost, amen. I had a religious experience, I hadn't seen a box of Boo-berry in a long time. I was at once reminded of childhood memories of breakfasts with my favorite fruity specter, and the horror after it was taken off the market as sales dropped. My wife not being a pop culture addicted moron such as myself thinks I'm insane, and she's probably right. I'm a twenty-eight year old man who eats Children's cereal, is this wrong. Look I've never gotten to that turning point in a persons life where all the cereals in the cupboard turn from Fruity Pebbles and Lucky Charms to Grape Nuts and Special K, does this mean I have some Peter Pan " I don't want to grow up" syndrome or is it simply basic pop culture obsession. Okay I admit it I'm a pop culture addict, If I added up all the time I've wasted watching some Vh1 show about the 80's or the one-hundred most self indulgent moments in Bulgarian prog rock, I'd probably have had enough time to have done something worth while like finished reading War and Peace like I've resolved to do every new years since I turned twenty-one. When it boils down to it how many conversations am I ever going to get into about War and Peace, and how many conversations have actually (and depressingly) had about some meaningless pop culture nonsense? The ratio would be like three to a hundred-zillion, and the three conversations I had about War and Peace were all about how I and the person I was having the conversation with hadn't actually finished reading War and Peace. The fact of the matter is that cereal is comforting, no let me rephrase that, children's cereal is comforting. No matter how f@..!ed up the world gets Boo-berry stays the same, no matter what messed up sh..t is happening on the evening news Lucky Charms still has enough Marshmallows to choke Ethan Hawke. It's kind of a Gen X right of passage to sit in your boxer shorts in front of the evening news or Conan O'brien munching on a bowl of brightly colored sugary corn/rice/wheat flakes/puffs/balls as it bleeds into the milk turning it the color that Timothy Leary saw every time closed his eyes. I don't think I know one person who hasn't done this every night for at least one year of their lives. Besides Grape nuts tastes like dirt and dirt reminds me of holes and holes make me think about graves and graves make me think about death and do I really want to be obsessing about death at the breakfast table, I think not. Long Live Boo-berry!!!!!!! Until next time catch ya' on the flip-side.